My own religion

I have never been a conventionally “religious” person. I was baptized Catholic and I have experienced and tried different churches, but I never had the desire or the pressure from my parents to attend. Some may see this as a loss, but I am really grateful they allowed me to make my own choices when it came to God. My grandma Marie is rolling in her grave right now as I admit this because she was the most devout Catholic I have ever known – I will always admire her for how loyal and beautiful her love of God was. She never missed a service, was constantly praying and was a wonderful woman of worship. This is not to say that I don’t believe in God, because I do. I am Christian, I pray, and I have spiritual faith that carries and comforts me, but I never found a place where this faith and my beliefs fit into an organized setting. I am not convinced that this is a horrible thing or that I am sinning or going to hell because of it. I actually think I am well rounded and open minded to faith and while I may not attend church every Sunday, by being true to myself and not subscribing to traditions that are not in my heart, I think I am being truer to God. So with this said, it can be assumed that I do not read the bible religiously (no pun intended) and I have very little knowledge of even some of the well-known stories. Sure, I know “In the beginning…” but the rest is a little lost on me.

 

So naturally, I was unsure as to what to expect when Robert asked me to go see the Mount View (one of the top professional acting schools in London) showcase of Stephen Schwartz’s musical (he wrote the music for Wicked) called Children of Eden. This beautiful story weaves the famous biblical tales of the Old Testament into a compelling and moving production. The music, choreography and talent of the students was extraordinary, and religious or not, the brilliance of Stephen Schwartz can make a believer out of anyone. The venue was really small and the intimate setting – chairs surrounding a circular platform that rose about a foot off the floor –made it feel as though you were in the magic of the production – a part of the character’s world. That is the best place to be – immersed in the art of it all. The story was woven together with such wit and I walked away so impressed and so moved – not to mention, much more educated on what comes after the whole “in the beginning…” spiel. Seeing the show, and then going to a pub (yes Dad, another pub J ) with Rob, Gordon and their hilarious friends James, Kevin and Will was the highlight to an otherwise ordinary school day. I know what you are thinking - lucky me, at an adorable pub in a corner booth surrounded by five cute men – but let’s just say they are not my “type,” which actually makes their company so entertaining. They are all great, and I have no problem being the Grace to their Will, if you know what I mean J.

 

Overall, the show was a much-needed escape from the stresses of preparing for our fall break and the monotony of our classes. We had to wake up extra early this morning to attend an internship meeting at the school at 9 am – which means commuting in the peak of morning rush hour. We finally arrived huffing and sweating, only to be told that our coordinator completely forgot about the meeting and wouldn’t be in until 10am – at which point I wanted to kill someone. Then the Internet in the school wouldn’t work, so we were there two hours before class started WITHOUT internet to be productive, staring at the walls and plotting our revenge against our incompetent coordinator.

 

He finally arrived and we met with him briefly where he went on some rant about how we shouldn’t write in the first person – it’s a journal for Pete’s sake, please tell me how that is even possible! the internet eventually started to work and I went about making my class schedule for winter and spring semester because registration is beginning at Elon. This was a bit of a rude awakening, stressful of course (because I make everything in my life stressful – give me a valium asap..) but mostly because it was a reminder that being here will come to an end. The upcoming fall break marks the middle of the semester and it feels like we got here just yesterday. It is crazy to think about, so I usually choose not to, with the exception of when I am forced by my advisor to plot out the six month daily grind that is going to depressingly follow four of the most exciting and academically carefree months of my life – not so appealing. While I cannot wait to see my family and friends (seriously, you have no idea how much I miss you all), going back to classes everyday and no internship with Rob and Gordon is going to be like attending a church service – awkward, uncomfortable and boring. (okay, okay – I am being a drama queen, I know it will all be fine because I love Elon, but it just won’t be the same excitement that is here).

 

At 11:15 classes actually began, in which we discussed the play I saw last night in Theatre and learned more about Hitler in history – as if I haven’t heard enough about the psycho who tried to take over the world already (talk about not being religious – this man had no concept of faith, morals or values whatsoever – and if there is a hell, I pray with all my heart he is rotting there –forced to forever inhale the disgusting smoke of the woman who ran the hostel I stayed at in Scotland – forever and ever - amen). After, Katie and I stayed in the classroom for two hours looking up tours and planning the sights we want to see on our trip, which was a challenge to coordinate. I really wish we used a travel agent to plan our trip, but everything happens for a reason and I know it was be a blast. Before I knew it, the time ticked by and I was straight off to meet up with the guys to go to the theatre in Wood Green, a stop in North London.

 

We had a quick and cheap (thank goodness) dinner in a café off a grocery store where I actually had a delicious ham and mozzarella panini for only three pounds – woop woop!. Then we were off to the show, which got me to reflecting upon my original point –organized religion and its place, or lack there of, in my life.

 

My conclusion to all this clutter is that I have created my own way of believing. I see God in so many places beyond the pages of a bible. I see God in the beautiful voices of the actors on stage, in the smile of the seven-month-old baby I held in my arms last week, in the wonder of the High Lands in Scotland. I see God in my relationships with my friends and family, in the challenges I face that make me who I am, and in the opportunities and blessings I have in life. I do not need a pew or a priest, and I much prefer a loaf of bread with butter than a small wafer paired with a sip of fruity wine. I see God, but just in a different way, which was Stephen Schwartz’s entire intention of writing Children of Eden – he wanted the audience to see God and the stories of the bible with different eyes. And while it may be unconventional or perhaps even controversial, I think my grandma would have really enjoyed seeing the show with me. And what is really special about what I believe is that I feel like she is always with me, and so perhaps, she already did. 

 

Love and hugs,

Jenny